The good, the bad and the ugly?

Walking in the Valmasque yesterday morning, with the good the bad and the ugly, that is to say Max the dog, that Nice Lady Decorator and Pesky mutt Banjo, (not necessarily in that order – in fact the only one you can be sure about is Banjo is either bad or ugly or both) was a surprise give the dire weather forecast, but in actual fact it was quite pleasant. I am not willing to enter into any other speculation except to confirm, obviously, that the Decorating person is the good. I was as fresh as a daisy having now gone 4 days and nights without a drink. At this rate, by this time next week I shall resemble a whippet.

Talking of whippets, that breed of dog much loved by those northern chaps, we are invited to man mountain Peachy Butterfield’s for a “home cooked” Sunday lunch today. His size might allow some to speculate that he is more keen on eating them than whippetting them, or whatever they do up north for entertainment. His emailed invitation contained references to wine in cardboard boxes and the Naked Politicians’ bare buttocks. It was not an invitation one would want to show anyone who knows the meaning of the word etiquette. In fact I think Peachy might think that is a penalty imposed for illegal parking.

It seems there is quite a gathering although as far as I can see, no Currencies Direct clients, yet, and I shall be allowing myself a one day holiday from my self imposed fortnight of temperance, (in a desperate attempt to allow my liver time off for good behaviour). I feel I deserve it after accompanying a thirsty decorating operative to the Queens Legs, La Kavanou and Le Kashmir in Valbonne on Friday night and not having a drink at any of them.

The Valmasque

Amongst those on the luncheon list is, as I have suggested above, The Naked Politician. He gave up politics a few years ago after, well, he gave it up, but now I have reason to believe he will be making a comeback and I hope to extract some details at lunch. Another guest is Simon Howes, who is a great friend of UKIP leader Nigel Farage, so we may even have some interesting political debate underway, as long as our senses are not too dulled by the application of Peachy’s card Bordeaux. But what am I saying? Simon almost single handedly keeps Chateau Gloria in profit, so I shall be staying near to him, or at least his bottles.

The lovely Poly Bufton emails to say she does NOT read the Daily Mail, but the Swampy article she sent me, and which I featured in this column, was from that self same publication, and I have first hand experience of her attempts to get the Mail online on her IPad whilst aboard Sea Breezes, so, methinks she doth protest too much, as someone with a poor grasp of English may once have said.

Last night, we stayed in, after the That Nice Lady Decorator’s big night out the evening before. We were feeling a little jaded it seems, and with the weather beginning to turn, we lit the log fire for the first time this autumn. It is nearing the time to go back to the UK, just over 2 weeks to go before getting the snow chains out and heading north to hunker down in Arundel for the winter. It is when the first fire of winter is in the grate that my thoughts turn to what the lies in store, apart from the misery of an English winter. I am still toying with the idea of going to Brisbane later next month for the first Ashes cricket test, but it is a fearfully expensive venture and unless I can find deal I may be forced into spending 5 early mornings glued to the TV to watch events. Then, after Christmas, there is the small matter of a 50th birthday party, which is sensibly being staged in Barbados, so I may be able to struggle through.

Chris France
@Valbonne_News