Beast on two wheels

There is another aspect to dieting that I had hitherto not taken board. If one diets to within a centimetre of ones life, it is clear that one’s immune system suffers serious damage. I have not had a cold for well over a year, except for man flu about 9 months ago, but as you will know if you are a regular reader of this column, that is it is the female equivalent in terms of distress to a man as childbirth is to a woman. Thus to catch a cold, which I seem to have done yesterday, can have only one culprit, one cause, one focus of blame, the diet.

Manfully, I struggled around a walk of a couple of miles near Pagham on the south coast, coughing and sneezing but uncomplaining, and allowed myself to be lured into the Crab and Lobster at Sidlesham for a pint of rather uninteresting local beer, so uninteresting that I have forgotten what it is called. I had also allowed myself (and ladies, don’t forget this whilst suffering the same, if not worse, than the symptoms of childbirth) to be taken to the 6 Bells at Lyminster for a pint of London Pride before being allowed to return home to take paracetamol and sleep.

There is an old expression about pride coming before a fall and that was exactly what happened. As soon as I had collected up and consumed a pint of Pride, then, metaphorically, I fell. If I was ever to be asked what would be the top 10 attributes of That Nice Lady Decorator, then sympathy would not feature. She was not best pleased that I had “decided” to suffer my affliction just at the point where she had arranged to meet the lovely Kathryn (whom I promised never again to call the Wyatt Earp if Arundel), for a drink in the early evening at The White Hart. I was told that I would be accompanying her and that I would report, washed and scrubbed, at 5.30pm sharp for inspection. Thus, it was my duty to be ready at the appointed time, together with my hospital bed and drip, ready to go to the pub.

I stayed the course until 8pm after which I headed to my bed. All man flu sufferers will understand the position. As I tumbled into bed , I realised that I had nothing planned for today’s column, other than the usual praise for the services of Currencies Direct, so began to look through the photographs on my phone when I came across this, clearly taken the night before and of which I have only scant memory.

What an attractive beast

I think I can say it is a  1500 cc  beast on two wheels. Clearly it is a powerful beautiful and dangerous animal and…I don’t know where I am going with this. I also have no knowledge of why I took the picture, or indeed of taking it.

Today, after throwing off the worst effects of that ghastly man flu, I hope to be sufficiently recovered as to be able to board the train for London, and to be ready to witness once again the delight that is Otway and Barrett at the Leicester Square Theatre this evening. The arrangements are now just about all in place for the Otway For An Oscar Campaign in Cannes during the Cannes Film festival in May and no doubt we shall allow ourselves a small celebration of that fact.

Staying in London in Covent Garden allows one to contemplate eating out at one this areas fine restaurants. So that us what we have decided to do, however Sprog 2 got wind if this and has invited herself and her friend to dinner. A pleasure shared is a price doubled.

Chris France
@Valbonne_News