Semi Naked Dirty Dancing in Chateauneuf
I have awoken not in my own bed, but on the pav after a night almost beneath the stars. That nice lady decorator (formerly known as the resident plasterer) has gone to make the tea whilst I try to remember the sequence if events that brought me to be here. I have taken picture from where I am lying whilst I write this.
Room with a view - from the pav at dawn
The party last night in the fabulous setting on the terraces at le Peyloubet was highly entertaining. I will be claiming half of my winnings from Mr Thornton Allan as Nick Davies was he naked before midnight, and was otherwise on typical form, which is exactly the reason that any mother would be entitled to worry!
With views down to the sea more than 15 miles away and stretching from Theoule in the west to Nice in the East, it is a truly stunning location there must be so much more money than I thought in selling singing Birthday cards.
I am piecing together events, one of our party asleep on a sofa, ( I am too polite to name him but Pul T A will know who I mean), that nice lady decorator was dirty dancing with our host (actually its the only kind of dancing he does, and frankly he would dance with anyone, even soliciting my good self as I tried to sneak past without catching his eye for another of Bridie’s wonderful samosas), Marc Wolff wearing a lamp shade on his head.
Other token attempts to adopt the Asian theme of the party include Neil Humphrey’s ninja hat, sadly made out of cardboard, Micheal “I’m not gay” Walker in a jaunty sailors hat perched cheekily on the top of his head – he must have had trouble driving there wearing that in his powder blue (!) Audi. Perhaps he was looking for trouble?
A chap whose name I did not get was wearing a kilt, and when I asked him how he imagined his sartorial offering was in any way Asian he replied that he had been shipwrecked in Indonesia. Obscure you may think? And you would be right.
Wayne Browns only nod towards the theme was to wear a bright scarf over his normal scruffy attire, a move forward indeed! Our host Lise Davies looking slinky in silk, and a charming Lithuania girl in the tightest rubber dress I have ever seen.
It is coming back to me now, that nice lady decorator having made our room ready for the first of this seasons rental clients, did not want it being besmirched (what a great word!) by the likes of me, so at 2.30 this morning the pav, already previously in use as a party room, an afternoon retreat, and an office, has a new use, as a campsite. But you know what? it was great, and I slept very well, so this could become a regular occurence whilst the nights remain warm.
Warm nights of course will be a distant memory when we finally hit the shores of Britain on Tuesday. Packing my suitcase today is very depressing as it is full of jumpers and coats. Please don’t believe the hype being peddled by the UK media that the weather is good in England, it is all a carefully controlled media campaign to stop people trying to rent my house ((still available 17 July to 31st July! Have a look here Mates rates available on request!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Best Estate Agent in Mandelieu? www.chrisma.com
Storms and tempest await
The usual suspects were all in attendance at the International Club summer solstice party last night. It seems to have escaped organiser and vice president George Kasiliyake, that the summer solstice was about 10 days ago, but as the directions to get to the event were late arriving, maybe there is manyana theme running here?
Anyway he organised a great party in a sublime setting with fabulous spicy food including a wonderful Sri Lankan curry at a private villa in Mougins.
Mike and Wendy, founders of Angolinfo were there, Mike of course wearing his inevitable crocs, he mentions that he had been gardening in the heat so I asked if he had gardening crocs. “Two pairs” he said, I think he has 27 different pairs, including for hiking, cycling and was about to buy a golfing version at my behest. He was also alarmingly interested in stiletto crocs…
Delicately I avoided the question I had raised previously raised about bedroom crocs, but the numbers involved here seem to imply the worst. Count them, how many activities can you think of that would need different footwear…
This will be my final chance to visit Cafe Latin, aka church, for several weeks, so I show this picture of it, so I can look at it whilst away, assuming of course they have internet anywhere in England.
Church, scene of many absolutions, sometimes known as Cafe latin
My stress levels are rising with the thought of the impending drive north on Saturday. I have just been packing my anorak, wet weather gear, deer stalker hat and a range of umbrellas, ready to face the tempests that await me.
Someone has snitched. Someone has alerted the resident plasterer to her epithet. She has demanded a change, so I will suggest she will in future be known as that kind decorating lady. Let’s see if that leaks back to her.
Back to the trip , the big drive starts Saturday in the skip, as the 4 x 4 is affectionately known, which is owned by that kind decorating lady. The only solace I shall have in the next two days is a night at my favourite french Chateau, Chateau Cocove, about 10 minutes drive from the tunnel entrance at Calais. I think it is my favourite because it is the first port of call after leaving behind politically correct and politically inept England, or the last bastion of civilisation before setting of into frankly what I would like to think of as the unknown, but it is too well-known for my liking. I am disbelieving of reports, obviously planted by the UK tourist office, that the weather is hot, I can tell you it will not be so when I am there.
Regular readers will be delighted to know that I intend to continue this daily missive whilst away, so I can report truthfully on the depth of the horrors facing those poor souls still trying to escape.
Tonight, the last social occasion of the early summer at Le Peyloubet with colourful hosts Nick & Lize Davies at their fabulous and previously Dom Perignon dynasty owned villa in Chateauneuf. The theme is sub continent, but I bought the dish dash I am going to wear from Morocco, I wonder if anyone will care? (note to self – must ask Mike Hardacre with a K if he has an Aladdin style crocs).
I have a bet with Paul Thornton Allan that Nick will be naked before midnight, so Paul make sure you bring your money. A full report tomorrow
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Best Estate Agent in Mandelieu? www.chrisma.com
Blog “Ghastly” – official
Last night a light supper in the pav with Wing Commander Spensley being particularly vitriolic about my writing of this column, with moustache bristling his description includes the word “Ghastly”. Harsh but fair you may think? However he appears to be in a minority unless the 200 or so of my dedicated followers are too polite to say! He puts me in mind of a bucolic ex brigadier from Tunbridge Wells or the like, full of indignation (and red wine), and bluster and determined to make his point. For Mr Spensley, perhaps it is easier to get older than wiser? I can of course be as rude as I like to my dear friend as he has sworn never to read this column on principle, but his lovely wife Maryse admits to browsing occasionally..
The pav, in daylight, before the "ghastly" outburst
I play golf with Gerard Gomis, former professional rugby player to try out his newly acquired clubs (or bats as he calls them in his quaint French accent), and frankly he plays golf like a rugby player.
I tell him it is not supposed to be a contact sport and he takes me rather literally by failing to make contact with the ball on many occasions. He tells me he has not played for 6 years. I have no comment to make.
Tonight to the International Club Party at Mougins which sounds like fun, with barbecue, fine wines, jazz band and other entertainment. I like their statement that despite this being a business club, ties, jackets and stilettos will be confiscated at the entrance, not than any of those items will be in the wardrobe of Mr Wayne Brown from fr2day, our host for the evening, with the possible exception of the stilettos. Talking of stilettos, I wonder if Mike Hardacre (with a K) from Anglo Info knows where to acquire stiletto crocs?
Two days to go before back to dank and dismal England, land of my youth, before my wild oats had turned to prunes and All Bran. however a number of golf grudge matches are in prospect, so I will check the wet weather gear still exists (it is not needed here in the Core D’Azur) and prepare to take money from a series of fridge magnet salesmen, builders and accountants. They all know who they are.
Particularly galling is the fact I have just discovered that the resident plasterer has arranged for us to go up north, to Yorkshire of all places, albeit as she says, just for a couple of days. Regular readers will know I am no lover of the tundra covered wastes north of Coventry, and I may have been less than polite about that part of the world in the past, but I will bear up stoically, after I have received of course all my inoculations for black death and jaundice and whatever other unspeakable diseases that are rife up there.
At least it will be bright until midnight, given the proximity to the arctic circle, and there is at least one half decent beer to be had in the very few stockaded areas of civilisation. I will need large quantities to wash down all that tripe and black pudding so beloved of the locals. Pain and suffering is inevitable, but the misery is optional.
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Best Estate Agent in Mandelieu? www.chrisma.com
Killer Prawns, we name the guilty woman
” Been nice knowing you” so said the resident plasterer after cholesterol laced lunch at Jimmy’s killer prawns yesterday. I thought, when I won a tombola prize at the Careers and Lifestyle exhibition in Valbonne recently, that it was just a free meal. However, when we arrived there to take advantage of this prize, which was to expire on 30th June, it was a bit more than that. It was a “Millionaires Platter” at 78 euros for 2, so the quick lunch and then back to work idea did not go to plan. A picture of it is shown below;
A light lunch
Given my recently diagnosed high cholesterol, I now know why this establishment is called Jimmy’s Killer Prawns! We felt duty bound to buy some beers and rose so that they at least had something from us, but after the resident plasterer got a taste for being plastered, much rose was consumed (mainly by her you understand) and in a typically grateful moment she said, the next time I decided to win a prize could I make it to “win some free clothes” somewhere.
She must have known that I had won a discount voucher for 20% off clothing at the very swanky Valbonne clothes shop at the Mougins School Fair! I suggest that my threadbare wardrobe could do with a little expansion but this is dismissed out of hand and after a little whimpering and whining, I duly handed over the voucher to she who must be obeyed.
Actually, yesterday, she saw the page where I was briefly nice to her, so all her friends telling her that I am being rude about her have been dismissed, well at least by me.
Last night for some last-minute “square bashing” which regular readers will know is a verb meaning to abuse food and alcohol in Valbonne Square. with John Balodis of valbonneonline and his lovely assistant Jane (that means his wife!) and Paul Thornton Allan of Creative Village, plus Pippa from Currencies Direct and Gerald Gomis.
John is about to become an agent for some kind of electric scooter which sounds a bargain at 1700 euros, his barrowboy tendencies again to the fore as he tried to sell one to both myself and Mr Thornton Allan, however for the usual fiver I will happily feature it in this column.
Today I am challenged to 9 hole of golf by Gerald Gomis of Leggett Immobiliere (which if this name is highlighted will mean the inevitable fiver has once again changed hands – if not then it will be soon, trust me!) . The former professional rugby player has recently retired from rugby and taken up golf, and as he said in his very good English “I want to try out my new bats” so I detect the possibility for a certain amount of amusement.
Wing Commander Spensley and delectable wife Marys are our guests for dinner this evening, so I will have to lock up any red wine that I am not prepared to donate to the Spensley corner, his appetite being rightly famous in these parts.
Then it is downhill further tomorrow night with the International Club party in Mougins, and then to trump everything The Davies party at Peyloubet on Friday, which promises to be a big one!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Best Estate Agent in Mandelieu? www.chrisma.com
Channel Tunnel Shocker
And so, a full day of work, completed in a few hours,which is quite a long day for me. To Port de la Rague to meet Christine at Chrisma Estate Agents in the beautiful setting of Port De La Rague. She is so keen to affiliate to Currencies Direct and of course feature in this vitally important publicity machine, and so enthusiastic, I break my own rule and allow her to sign the forms on the spot.
Then on to Monaco to meet with the oldest bank in Monaco, CFM, deals are done, decisions made, the wheels of commerce oiled again and then lunch! Life is especially full at the moment, but tonight I have no engagement and so I continue my new writing career over a nice Premier Cru St Emilion in the writers retreat otherwise know as the pav, but on the way in late afternoon sunshine I take this picture.
Artichoke in flower, one of the few plants undamaged by the marauding Banjo
We are disturbed by odd noises during a late evening digestive in the pav. It is the noise of a tree frog. I hate frogs, says the resident plasterer, but live and let live, I say, most of the french I meet are nice chaps!
I decide to invite friends to the international club event at Mougins on Thursday but am amazed when they tell me it is sold out. “Don’t you know who I am?” I say, and am bemused and hurt by the response which is “no”. They may well suffer the curse of Chris at some stage in the future.
I book the channel tunnel crossing for my trip back to drudgery, rain and depression, England, and am charged more for the 2 dogs alone than for the car and 2 adults together! I suggest that a bullet would be a cheaper option for the resident plasterers dog Banjo, but receive the familiar withering look.
Part of my depression about going back to the UK is,of course, that I am facing the prospect of spending 3 weeks in close proximity to Banjo, the most unpleasant dogs I have ever encountered. Banjo is an unprepossessing animal and is a thief, disobedient, vindictive, unreliable and 3 times the size a cocker spaniel should be. I think there is a bit of wolf in there somewhere. It is said that dogs take on the personas of their owners bu this is of course a complete fallacy, at least that’s my written opinion, after all, it is not out of the question that she may read this column one day, but if it were true then you will not be surprised to hear that the proper dog, Max, the good faithful old retainer, to whom I claim joint ownership, is obedient, reliable, supportive and loving.
Furthermore, I am disturbed by TV images of apparently sunny weather back in blighty. Such footage is clearly fake, but what worries me is if the authorities in England are going so far as to fabricate footage of good weather, how bad must it be in reality?
Lunch today will be taken at the rather unseemly named Jimmy’s Killer Prawns in Valbonne. Personally I would not venture there after a poor meal some time ago, but a tombola prize of a free meal won at the Career and Lifestyle Exhibition runs out tomorrow, so according to the in-house decorator it must be used.
I am a little suspicious about her insistence, I would happily let the “prize” lapse, particularly as Prawns are very high in cholesterol, and I have a recently diagnosed high cholesterol problem, but she is strangely determined. I wonder why?
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Best Estate Agent in Mandelieu? www.chrisma.com
Golfing etiquette spurned shocker
And so to golf with Dave the Fade, Steve the Sheep and Maria the Pecker and the rest of the Landlubbers group at Opio Valbonne. Sadly I miss the superb photo opportunity presented when Maria went over to console Paul Duffy who was laying down on his back distraught after a number of wayward shots. I am not sure that her rather startling methods of relaxation helped Paul much, actually I lie, I know they helped him a great deal.
Delicacy prevents me from a full description of her “therapy” but the picture that escaped me would certainly have been one to behold. Perhaps it was the hot sunshine that raised temperatures, certainly my game collapsed after this incident, but I can quite understand the passion that golf arouses. Just last week I would have married my driver (golf club, not chauffeur) had I not already been entwined. Bigamy I hear you say, and I would reply, yes, one does ones best. Actually, that is definitely the worst joke I have ever made in this column.. and whilst talking of the worst, this was my lie after a poor drive at the 6th yesterday.
sitting up rather nicely I thought
Last year Mac Mackay, an old friend had a golf ball hit the windscreen of his car whilst driving past the Grande Bastide Golf Club. He went into the pro’s shop to remonstrate and met the lady who had hit the golf ball into the road.
She was rightly appalled at the carnage she could have caused and asked the pro what she could do to help. After a few moments consideration he replied that she should turn her grip a bit to the right and keep her head down….
Steve the Sheep Weston complains about his nickname which is now in general use amongst the Landlubbers golf group. He says he is being punished for one little slip (or one little fleece?), seeming to forget that I have incriminating emails and pictures which he sent me over a period of time and manifold witnesses who will testify to his sheep fetish.
And so to the barbecue with a sporting theme with neighbours Pete and Julie Bennett. Successful is the only way one could describe England’s sporting day, our glorious cricket team triumphed over Australia in the one day internationals, and our boys Hamilton and Button continue their dominance of the Formula 1 season and even an unpleasant Scotsmen is doing rather well at tennis. Apparently there was a football match going on but that was of no interest to me (or frankly anyone liking football).
And so today to Monaco with the lovely Pippa to meet with senior bankers from the Principality, still celebrating the engagement of their Prince, to discuss currency exchange rate issues. I am very much looking forward to his show on 25th July in Monte Carlo, – I wonder if he will perform “Purple Rain”?
After today there is a welcome break in the schedule before parties on Thursday in Mougins and Friday at Peyrloubet, the stunning residence now for sale and once owned by the Dom Perignon dynasty, where the current incumbent Nick Davies will no doubt be attired (for at least the first part of the night) in something entirely exotic, the event having an eastern theme.
Nick is of course famous for dis-robing in the most inappropriate places, the most notable of which was on the beach in St Tropez at famous restaurant Cinquante Cinq. I believe he was trying emulate Brigitte Bardot who memorably began the topless theme in the 1950’s, but he was about to go to a step further, ie bottomless until rugby tackled by long-suffering wife Lise.
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Crocs from Dundee?
After my piece on crocs yesterday, I am sent a link my Mike Hardaker of Anglo Info to a website supplying golf crocs! I must say they look so awful I may be tempted!
His wife Wendy was clearly trying to remain unidentified when calling herself Ann on Friday, I assume that such is the imagined opprobrium with which one is treated if in the vicinity of crocs that she considers a pseudonym necessary.
At first there was no response from him to the suggestion I made about his and hers crocs yesterday, but later I receive a frankly incomprehensible missive about Argyll knee socks, and then goes on to relate that his lovely wife Wendy had to tie my shoelaces for me at The Riviera Business Club party on Friday.
Of course this particular act could be mistaken for something different from certain angles, but I will fight anyone who suggests that her kind offer of help and the service she administered was anything other than the tieing of an old mans shoelaces.
The almost universal distaste for Crocs has become apparent from the comments I receive. Mike Preston writes about “Rhodesian Flatdogs” as crocs were apparently known in his part of the world, he says he realised that his girlfriend hated him when she gave him a pair.
I wonder if there was a tartan croc, made in Scotland, would they be called Cocodile Dundee? Just cant see it going with the kilt that I wheel out at certain times of the year to give the girls a thrill fright.
Such was the success at my bar at the Mougins School Fair yesterday that nearly every beer was sold. This despite being next door to the champagne bar organised by the very beautiful Anne, where we had to insist on a ribbon barrier to stop the great unwashed, troughing in bubbles next door, from overflowing into my rather more genteel bar area. You can just see the chasm of class between the two areas in my picture below which shows some of my staff, Peter Bennett for Blue Water, Simon Howes and Paul Thornton Allan for Creative Village hard at work (supposedly) dispensing beer (mainly to themselves it should be noted) and wine to the thirsty revellers.
Drink no evil, eat no evil, smoke no evil
An astute viewer of this picture may notice the linen tablecloth on the left hand side, the “decoration” theme for their rather down market and frankly limited offering of champagne and canapes adjacent.
Also their use of plain glass flutes to serve their wares cannot be matched by the size and sheer quantity of polystyrene cups, our chosen mode of drink delivery. I did however notice another detail in this picture which leads me to suspect a bit of backsliding. Mr Howes, in the centre, appears if one looks at his hand gesture, to be ordering 2 glasses of champagne from my rivals. His protestations that he was merely tuning into Glastonbury in his head is frankly a very poor excuse.
In all seriousness sometimes, well often, lacking in this column, it was a great day out, the highlight for the kids being Brian Hickmore, the headmaster, consigned to the stocks and receiving a number of direct hits!
I am double booked this afternoon, I have accepted a barbecue invitation from the lovely Maria The Pecker, whilst the resident plasterer has accepted another barbecue invitation at the same time. So after some discussion at me, rather than with me, it was decided, but not with any input from me, that the in-house decorators invitation acceptance took precedence. I know Maria especially will be relieved at the absence of this particular reporter at this event, but Maria, be warned, my ears and eyes are everywhere!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Bedroom Crocs horror – I name the guilty man
To Hotel Aston in Nice last night for the Riviera Business Club summer party where I meet Mike Hardacre (with a k as he will no doubt irritably point out again), co founder of Anglo Info once again wearing his inevitable crocs.
I suggest that I have never seen him wear anything but crocs – those peculiar “shoes” that look like a cross between a Dutch clog and a surgical slipper, and he agrees and admits under questioning that when recently presenting an award at a glittering black tie event at the Cafe De Paris in Monte Carlo, that he was wearing his “dress” crocs.
I suggest that there may be occasions when more appropriate attire might be more suitable, but he looks back blankly at me. Spurred on by champagne I ask if he ever wears anything else on his feet and he says no, he always wears them. At this moment in the discussion we are joined by his wife Ann, the joint co-founder of Anglo Info, so I rather dangerously asked her if he had “bedroom” crocs? Answer came their none, but from his lovely wife’s reaction I think I know the answer…the possibilities for such sartorial deviancy for “Bedroom crocs” leaves me momentarily breathless, do they have his and hers versions? perhaps his have little red horns on them?
Golf crocs? tennis crocs? skiing crocs? mountaineering crocs? whatever next?
Much talk of football, the French are appalled, the Dutch elated, the English expecting to have to fight them on the beaches again (The Germans), and lose on a penalty shoot out again. Myself I would be happy to get as far as penalties, as England has been so poor in this tournament that the USA, Algeria and even the Isle Of Dogs would be unhappy not to beat them.
So, looking forward to this afternoon and evening when I shall be barman at the Mougins School Summer Fair postponed from last Saturday. To be that side of a bar will be unusual for me in recent years, the resident plasterer often accuses me of being a good guest at my own parties, but I am looking forward to re-living those days in the 1970’s when staging gigs at The Hunt Hotel in Leighton Buzzard, when I was earning a percentage of the bar take! Boy was I quick then!
Tomorrow, golf with the Landlubbers group, that has recently swelled to 20+, this time at Opio Valbonne, also known as Chateau Begude with amongst others Dave the Fade, Steve the Sheep, Dave the gruff Northerner and Mick “German shooting trousers” Pedley.
Afterwards we are all invited to a barbecue and to watch the football at Maria’s so I show the only picture of her that I have.
Trust we wont be barbecuing the pecker?
So as you can see from this photo, this will be a calm and reserved event with no expectations of new material for this column, just certainty.
The week ahead is my last week before I am banished to dank and dreary England, but fear not, I shall continue to report daily although I cannot promise the events will be so exciting as when living in Valbonne.
But before I leave there are several diary items in prospect. I am called to Monaco for important consultations on currency exchange on Monday, via Cannes Mandilieu where the lovely Christine at Chrisma Estate Agents has seen the light and will no doubt commence saving her foreign clients money almost immediately in return for lavish coverage in this tome. Payola I hear you cry, and you would be right, but I prefer to think of it as merely a sensible business arrangement with the added bonus of knowing you are doing good in the community.
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Festival Of Fire Shocker
And so to Valbonnne for the festival of St Jean. As my photo shows, one could be forgiven for thinking it was the festival of St Blaize, such was the level of pyrotechnic danger witnesses in Valbonne square tonight.
Festival of St Blaize, almost literally
Kids as young as 5 holding blazing torches looks more like a celebration of St Blaize than St Jean, unless he or she (St Jean) was the patron saint of arsonists, but who am I to comment? St Matches would have been quite apt! but it was certainly exciting, a bit like watching a bomb disposal officer defusing a live bomb.
I do know that Health and Safety UK style would have stopped this festival in its tracks before the first molotov cocktail had been lit. But all’s well that ends well and the burns unit at the Esperance clinic hospital in Mougins passed a quiet night as far as I am aware, so has political correctness and the nanny state of health and safety gone to far in the UK?
The answer probably lies in a happy medium, as my friend Claire Voyant once told me, all I know is that we experienced a nice happy evening until the resident plasterer got arsy, as is her want after too many nights on the tiles. We all know not to argue, but to pretend to listen and to go straight to bed without arguing when the black mist envelopes her. Thankfully all is forgotten in the morning.
And so to work this morning. My writing capabilities have finally been recognised and I have been hired by Peter Bennett of Blue Water in Antibes to write sexy articles about yachting (like standing in a shower and ripping up £20 notes as I was once told) and holidays and the like. I forgot to mention my fear and loathing of proper sailing.
The last time I went on a boat was 3 years ago. I was invited to sail from Golfe Juan to St Tropez for lunch at Cinquante Cinq. This all seemed a spiffing idea on the way out of the harbour with a glass of champagne in hand, I took up that normal sailing position, legs apart, hands clasped behind my back, in fact I could have done with a captain’s hat, I wonder of Wayne had one in that pile I caught him wearing recently, actually that’s such a good picture I am going to show it again!
Bet there is a yacht captains hat in there somewhere
Anyway, the brisk wind blew up and I just about made it to St Tropez with the help of those special wrist bands to stop one being seasick. We had a very nice lunch and then as we were about to board for the short trip back, the captain said that there was a force 4 breeze forecast, so I said I would take the train. Against my better judgement I was persuaded by my children to get on the boat, tooled up with those special wrist bands on each wrist and not more than 90 seconds after leaving the harbour I had deposited all of my very expensive lunch over the infrastructure of this lovely white yacht.
So, just the man to write fluffy pieces about yachting, right?
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Macdonalds, Guinness and Kebabs in Cannes
To Cannes to the Quays Irish pub on the port to watch the football where the mighty England slashed Slovenia to slivers. That’s what I would have liked to write but the truth is that turgid England were mighty lucky to slip past Slovenia. It was a better performance than against Algeria, but that particular performance was a nadir amongst nadirs.
Wayne from FR2DAY has been compelled to take a flat in Cannes due to the number events that he has to attend in his position as Head Honcho (or should it be chief barrowboy) of the on-line lifestyle magazine. With the term Head Honcho in mind, please be aware that Wayne’s has many other hats as my other picture today shows.
Wayne Brown, deciding which hat to wear last night
What a fab position he has chosen as my second picture taken this morning from his third floor terrace shows. It also features an inanimate object, of which more later. The apartment is right in the heart of Le Suquet, the old town close to the market in an old building right on the famous rue Antoine, a stones throw from the port and the Palais.
View to harbour spoiled by horrid dancing toy
With all the fabulous restaurants within 100 yards, probably 50 or so, it defies logic that, with the resident plasterer and the luscious Lucy tired, emotional and asleep after our victory in the football, Wayne and I should search for an establishment serving kebabs, but we did. Something inexplicable happens to ones taste buds and ones sense of judgement after more than several pints of Guinness, and so this morning I have awoken in Cannes with only hazy recollections of events last evening. I do remember the kebab, in fact it is reminding me exactly where it is as I write this on Wayne’s terrace at 8 o clock this morning. I know the time precisely because, as Wayne calls it, his personal alarm clock, has just chimed in the church nearby. It could have been worse, it could have been a mosque with its wailing call to prayers. The in-house decorator who has just awoken to this cacophony believes that is a plot by campanologists (bell ringers Northy, look it up) having a fight in the workplace. Worse was to befall us much later, in fact near midnight, when the munchies returned and Lucy wanted a Macdonald’s, so, yes, with a plethora of great restaurants surrounding us, late lunch and dinner consisted of a kebab and a burger. I am so ashamed.
Old school friend Alan Brydon meets us in the pub and catches up quickly with festivities, although I don’t remember him buying a round, but disappears to the airport having changed his flight to ensure he did not have to buy is lunch today at Lou Fassum. I had made the mistake of thanking him in advance for his treat, and then suddenly important business came up and with flight changed and the sweat of fear mopped from his brow he was gone.
Generous in spirit but never financially, he reminded me that he was part of a group of us at school who were arraigned in front of the headmaster for removing classmate Steven Guntrips’ ham from his sandwich. Alan tried to sell it back to him after we were caught. He also reminded me that I borrowed an HB2 pencil from him in 1971 and had yet to return it! So mentioning that he was in the frame to pay had in retrospect inevitable consequences.
Today the Holland match is being shown on the beach in Cannes on a big screen sponsored by Heineken, so after a full days work by mid morning a meeting with a Swedish lawyer to discuss currency exchange and a gap in the luncheon diary now there is no one to pay for Lou Fassum I should be free to enjoy.
Now, back to the horrible apparition that hove into view last night. I don’t mean the resident plasterer herself, but what she purchased last night from one of the street hawkers, all it seems from Senegal it seems, and shown above.
What is not shown is the white stetsons that both she and Lucy purchased as well. Reminiscent of Kiss Me Quick hats of my youth and equally as vulgar. I do not know what goes on in some peoples minds after a few drinks! Never underestimate the stupidity of large groups of drunk people!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Social Tornado torpedoed
Nothing happened. Nothing. No last-minute call to dinner, no spontaneous party, not even an invite to watch football. My life is over. It is a cruel flashback to what it was like in England all those years ago before I saw the light and moved the wonderful vibrant, socially wild Cote d’ Azur. It is a heartless warning of what lies ahead when we forsake these shores for much of July for the gale ridden and rain-soaked land that was my birthplace.
A friend, Simon Barrett, still sadly marooned in the UK like 75% of the UK population who are reported to be dreaming of or thinking of moving abroad, emails to say its 28 degrees in UK yesterday, he must be cursing his luck to be scraping frost off his car window in the mornings in June. To be 4 degrees below zero in mid summer must be devastating. He is a sad victim of the weather over there, he is so stressed that all his hair has fallen out and he stopped growing at the age if 9, but I tell him 5ft 3ins is a good size for a man brought up in such impoverished and frankly brutal surroundings. For all that he is a good man, he sends his very much taller and singularly beautiful wife Debbie over to MIPCOM and MIP TV, two media festivals held in Cannes each year to maintain contact with civilisation.
Some people have even decided to go the World Cup in South Africa in their winter to get away from the English summer weather, or in one case, to avoid a good thrashing on the golf course. I will not name names but Paul North will know who I mean.
So we stayed in last evening and watched Football. Shameful, because here we are in the heart of the social maelstrom of the south if France but even as I write, normal service has been resumed. An invitation to Cannes to watch England V Slovenia is received from Wayne at fr2day. I find it helps to receive invitations of one remembers to turn ones phone on. Slovenia is a curious name for a country, it sounds like a Harry Enfield invention. Perhaps there are others like Slobenia or Slopenia? Is Slovenia a latin metaphor for “England are crap and are going to get whipped”? We shall see but although I have high hopes for this afternoon they are matched by low expectations.
This morning to Mougins School to meet the yummy mummy’s working on the rescheduled (for this Saturday) School Fair and make the final arrangements for setting up and stocking the focal point of the whole day, the bar. I am still on the prowl for volunteers to help me man it, so if you see me in Valbonne and don’t want to help out, do not catch my eye.
My picture today was taken at the Grande Bastide scene of my epic victory in difficult circumstances last Sunday. It shows my 2 protagonists on the day, Dave Goddard from his best side (ie his backside) and Dilip Soni manfully filling out (almost to capacity) that shirt, and a duck that happened to walk by.
Duck following curious aroma
I hear rumblings that some people, concerned about the directness of the undeniable truth that is this daily insight, are considering an alternative blog. I welcome any attempt to project an alternative albeit wrong viewpoint, but talk is cheap!! I want to see action!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Aliens forget to remove anal probe
Fete de la musique is quite a new phenomenon in France and although rather surprisingly nothing seemed to be happening in Valbonne. It takes place annually on 21st June, the longest day and people are encouraged to stage any kind of musical event, pretty much anywhere. Normally Valbonne is the first to get in on the act, they seem happy to celebrate even the most obscure saint, I bet they even have a festival for the saint of festivals ( St Fester?), but there was plenty happening in nearby Mouans Sartoux last night.
Mouans Sartoux has a more authentic French feel than Valbonne, but of course that means they get some things wrong, whilst some aspects of that peculiar gallic charm are welcome, some such as surly service are not.
For me in the gallic charm “plus” column is hearing french singers trying to sing in English. This brings a new comedic dimension to “Stairway To Heaven” for instance, which I heard from one of the scores of bands playing during the evening. I then began to think of what would be the funniest english lyric sung in french, maybe something by The Pogues? but then I had it; what I would have liked to hear in the same style would be the 7th best lyric of all time (according to a BBC poll in 2000) John Otway’s beautifully crafted “Beware Of The Flowers Cause I’m Sure They’re Going To Get You, Yeah” French style, now that would have been funny! One band in the château area, whose name I did not get suffered from their drummer clearly having more than his fair share of Columbian marching powder or something similar, talk about meandering to a different drummer, he was all fills and no rhythm….
The town was buzzing until well after midnight with the shows around the beautifully lit old château being the most attractive. Dinner in the old château square was very good despite the aforementioned lack of gallic charm from our waiter, perhaps the aliens had forgotten to remove his anal probe? anyway, the cabillaud was particularly good. Whilst dining we were entertained by accordion music which in these circumstances alone I find quite charming but in normal life I would throw something at the radio.
Accordion Music gets the local dancing in Mouans Sartoux old square
Today, nothing in the diary so respite for the liver?, one would hope so, but things in Valbonne don’t always turn out as you plan, and talking of planning there is a fairly full schedule before I leave for dank and dismal UK on 3rd July where I shall be forced to stay, touring around looking for good weather, until at least 26th.
Thursday to the excellent Lou Fassum in Plascassier with an old school chum, Friday to Hotel Aston in Nice for the Riviera Business Club party on the rooftop garden, and Saturday to the Mougins School Fair for the event postponed from last Saturday. Thankfully we have our normal lovely sunny weather back, so I shall be opening the bar at 4pm sharp and expect a good turnout, do not be late!
Golf with Dave the fade and the landlubbers on Sunday at Opio Valbonne where doubtless I will be once again vanquishing the field, some days you’re the dog, others the fire hydrant..
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Marj Simpson imposter shocker
The tradition amongst the Landlubbers golf group, now growing due almost certainly to the drip feed of publicity provided by this column, is for each player to contribute 5 euros to the winners fund, with the winner buying the drinks. This of course is a poisoned chalice given the ability of some to consume at the bar.
This arrangement of course has suited me well in the past as there is usually a high handicap bandit who wins with a score out of the reach of us proper golfers. However, just occasionally a good golfer has a great day as was the case yesterday and so with a happy heart I headed for the bar after my thrashing of, well, everybody to take some well deserved refreshment. The usual suspects did their very best to reduce the bar stocks (and here a special mention must go out, as is customary, to Paul Duffy) but the joy of winning was sufficient to offset the likely shortfall between winnings and bar bill. What I had not bargained for that Nancy Weston, treasurer of the money had left early after being caught in a shower! thus leaving me with an enormous bar bill and no winnings. And this, after manfully playing through some inclement weather for which I am rightly renowned for hating! Bitter sweet victory indeed!
My picture today is of Marj Simpson at the red radish event on Saturday, stories from which I am gradually remembering, such as Mr Soni who suffering a medical problem a few years ago had to be taken back to the UK by ambulance accompanied by a nurse, and so the old charmer broke open the old spice, shaved everything including his head and waited for the no doubt voluptuous and alluring young nurse to arrive and tend to his every need on the long journey back. Bearded and tattooed Nigel the nurse was not what he was expecting! I was reminded of “making plans for Nigel” as XTC (whom I once paid £10 to play a gig in Aylesbury) memorably intoned…
Marj Simpson impersonator in Chateauneuf
And so to a late lunch with some pals, including Paul Thornton Allan, of creative village our host, who is renowned for his wonderful exhibition systems, and who so memorably made an exhibition of himself on Saturday night. Also amongst those lunching is the carefree Michael Walker, also pictured today and in is usual gay pose, who reveals that he will go to Australia in autumn, a case of forsaking the Lancastrian land of tundra for the land down under?
Michael walker in typical gay pose in soft focus shot with extra gay shirt
Also at lunch famous local sailor Pete “Blue Water” Bennett reveals that he was once a navigator an early 70 metre yacht, and showed that ability by negotiating his way through a number of excellent Bourgognes and Bordeaux supplied by Mr & Mrs Thornton Allan and house guest Clive, owner of The Barometer bar in Meribel. There’s a joke I am missing here somewhere about the dropping glass of a barometer when stormy weather approaches and the mishandling of wine glasses, but I just can’t put my finger on it!
Finally, I hear one new golfing expression as told to me by John O Sullivan; “A first cousin” which refers to when you are right up there, you enjoyed it but you know you shouldn’t have!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
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More Sheep Shenanigans
Before the party last night, I spent some time organising the logistics of golf tomorrow. Steve Weston, the well know sheep fancier, sends this email “You do know its going to be a little damp tomorrow. We guessed you would cry off so we had planned to wear outrageous clothes and swap pictures of sheep. Do we have to abandon those plans now?” I am at a loss to understand how he could believe that there are many amongst us who would enjoy playing top trumps with pictures of sheep, perhaps he knows something I don’t? actually, now I come to think of it, he may have a point, I will not name names, but Paul Duffy, Mick Pedley and Dave Goddard have always looked rather sheepish to me…, and so I will publish again Steves favourite sheep picture
Dolly? cloned or just cossetted?
And so to the red radish beach party, or a change of venue brought on by the unseasonal weather? As I wrote this at 4pm, there was still no certainty. All I knew is that Bluebell the camper has 55 folded seats on board, awaiting final delivery instructions, but the huge storm approaching from the mountains has won, and with disappointment tinged with relief the venue has changed to Lucy’s house, a lovely spot anyway, but with renters due in at 10am this morning, a stupendous risk ! Mike Hardaker was one half of the musical entertainment, and proceeded to play “wish You were Here” as sola, a feat that he promised to do, and I watched and never want to see again. however, he refused requests (from me) to do a soils Bohemian Rhapsody, now that would have been something! And to crown the evening Lucy’s Paella was the best I have ever tasted.
And what a party it turned out to be!, once again a very rich in material for this blog event. I have a number of notes which I sent to myself by email which means that I will not be able to use all the material today! For instance, I have a picture of Michael Walker with an appalling shirt in a gay pose, I have a picture of Paul Thornton Allan doing a great Marj Simpson impersonation with a Jasmin bush, I am reminded that Dilip Soni was once given a saucy calendar and expressed the opinion that Miss February was very attractive but all the others were slappers, without realising that the calendar was of the same girl in different poses! Mr John O Sullivan was in attendance but this time with cigars albeit purchased not by himself but by his deliciously well endowed wife, Jude, and Soraya Colegrave regaled us all with stories about a full body massage, but I simple don’t remember the details, how annoying or perhaps I do and will reveal them on a different occasion – I think the war chest of potential blackmail items was swelled enormously!
And then to golf this morning, when Dilip received a whipping losing ny 15 shots despite a 10 shot start, and gruff northerner Dave Goddard suffering another whipping. A picture of me holding the trophy with 2 10 euro notes stuck on my forehead, but modesty forbids its immediate publication, I have far too many pictures in store that I am desperate to use before that! More tomorrow about both events….
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Resident plasterer gets plastered
There I was working hard, plotting the John Otway for Eurovision campaign – watch out for a Facebook page soon – when I had a rather incoherent call from the resident plasterer who had gone to Valbonne market to spend more money, and had been hijacked into some square bashing (square bashing – verb: to abuse food and alcohol in Valbonne Square).
The call was to invite me to join a happy throng including Dilip the Swinger, and John “where’s your cigar humidor” O Sullivan plus various wives, (some of them their own) and guests, who were busily “bashing”. For a workaholic like myself it is always a difficult decision to eschew work in favour of a social occasion, but I had a rare moment of weakness and accepted the invitation.
Suffice to say a great deal of rose had been consumed by the time I arrived straight from my desk, and I helped just a little. The resident plasterer was keen to go to Frances Thompsons Supper club in the evening but I was keen to watch the football, and anyone who either watched England or went to the Mexican evening will know which was the better choice! If we can’t impose ourselves on Algeria, we should get thrashed by Slovenia, and frankly I hope we do to put is out of our misery! I have never seen a worse performance from an England team. The Mexican evening was clearly enjoyed by all who attended. I know that to be the case because I went to collect the in-house decorator who had unwisely and as usual, enthusiastically entered into the spirit (literally) of tequila slammers. She was in a sorry state so I stayed for an hour or so, enough time to smoke a Montecristo No 2 before folding her up and taking her home.
Tonight is in the balance. With the postponement of the Mougins School Fair due to the possibility of storms, Lucy from Red Radish is in a quandary, but having bought ingredients for Paella for 55 people for the secret beach supper club, I reckon she will go for it and pray! It is a great idea, and it appears vaguely legal. No cooking with occur on the public beach in Cannes where I can now reveal it will take place, no alcohol sold, and according to at least one-off duty police person who will be attending, there appears to be no legal impediment to having party on a public beach, however, until it happens no one can be certain as to how or if the gendarmes will react..
Stormy skies over Valbonne, perhaps an evocation of the doom that will befall Dilip and gruff northerner Dave Goddard on the golf course tomorrow
A warning to avid readers of this daily insight, do not set your alarm for tomorrow’s post as it will be later in the day before I am able to compile my words of wisdom. This is necessary as we will stay in Cannes after the beach party tonight but the tee time of 8 54 on Sunday morning at the Grande Bastide will leave no time to post in the morning. I know this will be a blow so The Samaritans number is 0800 SUICIDE.
Fete De La Musique is a fairly recent French idea, and what a good one. Everybody is encouraged to stage or support outdoor music events and every town is awash with the great unwashed (musicians that is). My personal choice is Mouans Sartoux, 3 or so miles away where the range and quality of the musical offerings last years was hugely impressive. From punk, through metal, jazz and choral, something for everyone, and guerilla bars open all over the place.
Thereafter, the dairy is at present empty until Thursday, but I am willing to wager it will not stay that way!!
Chris France
buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance
Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/
Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/
Best French Riviera Property Agent?
http://www.afa-international.com/
http://frenchriviera-properties.com/
rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514
Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/
Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/
Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/
Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com
Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/
John Otway’s New Book? www.johnotway.com
Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html
Living France, Le Blog http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com
Chris France's Blog 