Avoid pencil thin facial growth

It was whilst walking along the Bajan coastline from Bathsheba to Tent Bay Fish Market yesterday morning, that I began to worry about the poor people. Obviously I have been hugely enriched by my involvement in the music industry and as an apologist for the services of Currencies Direct, but it hit me, as I walked along a sun kissed Caribbean beach, that some poor people might not be enjoying life in quite the same fashion as I. A social conscience is something well worth having, I just don’t know whether I could afford it.

Having returned from the fish market (nobody there and no fish in sight) and after a hearty breakfast at the stunning but  Round House Hotel, we decided to utilise the hire car and go exploring. A word or two of praise here for the hotel. It is in a wonderful position, right on the coast, one can hear the procession of huge waves breaking as one dozes off, there are only shutters at the windows with no glass because it never gets cold enough to need them, palm trees are all around, the staff are fantastic, but some people may well not like it. The place has a faded glory. For someone who wanted a well appointed, air-conditioned modern palace, it would be anathema. It has a hardy, run down character, which could not be recreated. The place has lived life, built in 1823, and not refurbished since the early 60’s it retains a charm all if its own.

So we set off following the least accurate map it has ever been my misfortune to follow, but that is the West Indian way. Nothing works in quite he way you expect it to, but in the end no one is damaged, a good time is had and the job is done. Take the taps in the sink of our bathroom. Somebody oblvious has, well at least one of them, as they are of a different design, and both are labelled “cold”.   The one the on left, the one that you cannot quite turn off entirely, is in fact for hot water, a fact that you can discover simply when you have run it for 5 minutes or so, and have washed and shaved in the cold water that it had previously produced. The Caribbean, you either love it or hate it. I love it.

The wild and windy north eastern coast of Barbados

Touring the island, which incidentally has no drink driving laws, is a most civilised and far-sighted policy decision, we took in some of the better known tourist haunts such as Mullins beach bar. Personally I do not believe anyone over 50 has ever had an accident when having over imbibed, which has been his fault. It is always those oiks from Essex, or yobbos under 25, who cannot hold their drink and think they are Michael Schumacher after a couple of shandies, who have been responsible for the government introducing the drink driving laws, and as a result destroying many of the great British pubs and that great British tradition of going to the pub and having a few pints then driving back home.

Last night we went to the other notable restaurant in Bathsheba, the Atlantic Beach, which, as its name cunningly suggests, is right in the same coast as the Round House. And do you know what? By sheer coincidence they are both on the coast of the Atlantic Ocean! What are the chances of that? We had booked earlier when walking past, and had made the reservation with a very pretty lady boy, whose nails were perfect, and his tiny pencil thin beard put me in mind of a similar pencil thin moustache once sported by The Reverend Jeff. The Reverend was not impressed at the time when I and others alluded to his resemblance, all those years ago, to an Italian ice cream salesman and referred to him as Luigi. But I digress, dinner was superb, wine and run punch was taken, and the drive home was completed as I had predicted, legally and without incident.

Chris France
@Valbonne_News