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Purple crocs and moths?

January 14, 2014

The lounge looked as if it had been hit by a tornado. That tornado was Sprog 2 , some of her friends and ably abetted by That Nice Lady Decorator. I had sensibly decided not to get involved with the revelry that occurred in Sunday evening. This was achieved without a great deal of effort in my part, as I slept through most of the shenanigans. I did however find myself picking the bits of broken glass in the hearth this morning and struggling to get into the kitchen due to the sheer numbers of empty bottles in evidence.

The result was that I was up with the lark, well a rather late lark, at around 9.30 and thus perfectly in time for my first organised cricket net practice for probably the best part of 20 years. A collection of venerable old cricketers gathered at the very impressive Arundel Castle indoor cricket school yesterday morning at 10.30 to begin the process of loosening the limbs in readiness for a cricket season that seems a long way off, given the amount of water still lying in the fields of Sussex. As many of you will know I am shortly to enter my 7th decade, reaching 60 in just a few short weeks, and I am astounded to say that of the 10 or so souls who turned up, I was the youngest. The thrill of being a young new oik was something I thought would not be something I would experience again.

I discovered that there is not only several over 50’s and over 60’s teams and quite a few fixtures, but there is also an over 70’s Test team, which played a series of matches against the old enemy, Australia, in England last summer. England won two of them with the third washed out, but there is a return series planned for Australia in November of this year. I now have a dream. I want to play Ashes cricket when I am 70.

crocs and old jumpers

Take a close look at the sweater, and the footwear.

Talking of ashes, I think that would be the best result for the cricket sweater being worn by a chap called Lloyd (I think). Perhaps he was a vicar in an earlier life because it was indeed the most wholy garment I have ever seen being worn seriously. If your look a bit lower down today’s photograph you will notice that he was also wearing crocs. Not just any crocs, but purple ones. Now it is sometime since I have focused on cricketing fashion, but has the world moved on so much that purple crocs can be considered as normal cricketing attire?

By the time you are reading this, I should be either on my way to Gatwick or already aboard the plane to Tenerife, but early reports seem to indicate that the weather will not be great, however, I refuse to believe this. It is merely propaganda put about by jealous sorts that are not jetting off to the Canary Islands today. I shall of course be reporting on the sunny weather tomorrow as there will be no let up; this column will appear each day I am away. Obviously my work with Currencies Direct is far too important for me to miss even 1 day of writing this vital daily column. There is also the fact that I have not missed a day since starting nearly 4 years ago and don’t intend to let you off now.

So a week in the sun is a knee jerk reaction to the dismal existence that is winter in England. It is not something I shall contemplate again (I mean wintering in England, not the escaping to the sun bit). It is only for a week, but by the time I get back next Tuesday, bronzed, fit and healthy, at least in my own mind, I shall be ready for anything with which the weather gods can ambush me.

Chris France
@Valbonne_News

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. January 14, 2014 10:50 am

    Ah, the cricket school ! It is where you learn the cricket, no ? But January is so early in the season… ah, but I think I know why : cricket is a game played between the gentlemen, n’est-ce pas, in a spirit of fair play and sportsmanship. For the, how you say, oik villagers of course it takes much time to learn such refined qualities of the gentleman. Ah, yes !

    Like

    • January 14, 2014 2:34 pm

      Ah Winnie, your English is wonderful but you are now venturing into a peculiar archaic area. Cricket is a wonderful game that very few French understand, and has a history and tradition all of its own. I was at cricket practice, which is why it is called a school, preparing for the season which will start at the end of April. In the coming months I will try to educate you!

      Like

      • January 14, 2014 4:40 pm

        Très bien, Monsieur ! I look forward to this very much … I am always happy to have my very wide knowledge widened even further. À bientôt, Monsieur !

        Like

  2. Rev. Jeff. permalink
    January 14, 2014 3:28 pm

    Watch out Winnie we all know what Chris means by that particular euphemism….!!!!

    He took off his vest and his jocks,
    Then removed both his shoes and his socks.
    Then he started to swear,
    ‘My toes !! They’re not there !!
    It’s his own fault for wearing those crocs !!

    Like

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