Blue Water at Monaco

Bloody hell, I had to turn down lunch because of work! Whatever next? I had a load of stuff to do ahead of a major deal I hope to conclude today and so when Peachy texted, my heart sank. I knew I would be missing a lunch which I would dearly have liked not to.

Tennis though was in the diary and starting at 5pm, and I managed to complete these irksome tasks in time to meet up with Mr Clipboard, the Wingco and Blind Lemon Milsted. Milsted was late, left early, did not have a post match beer and failed to pay his share of the cost of the court. Very poor, see me afterwards. He also contributed massively to what I fear may have been a reverse at tennis, letting down his partner (me) time and time again with lame dabs at the net. If it were not for the fact that he is a valued Currencies Direct customer, he would have received a tongue lashing.I say reverse but in actual fact, I cannot recall the exact result although I am nearly certain that we won.

Returning home in the evening I found some more poor chickens with beer cans stuck up their areses and languishing in the barbecue. It seems that That Nice Lady Decorator had so enthralled the petite, saintly and gorgeous Julie Bennett, wife of the even more saintly (as long as he gets Sprog 1 a job) Peter Blue Water Bennett, with the idea of “beer can chicken”. But in a depressing indication that summer is coming to an end, after drinks in the pav, we ate inside, and I saw at least two pair of long trousers amongst the assembled troughing gathering.

The San Bernardino Pass in Switzerland where we were last week

A late arrival was Slash and Burn Thornton Allan, who, along with Sprog 1 has spent the last two days building the Blue Water stand at the Monaco Yacht Show which opens tomorrow. It seems there are already 130 yachts of more than 25 metres already at anchor around the port with up to 200 more expected. Of course Peter is far too regal to get his hands dirty, whereas Slash and burn has dirt written all over him. All I can say is that I am glad he managed a shower before he turned up.

Today, I must journey to Cannes to meet with the great and good of the global music industry to complete an agreement which, when signed, will see me relinquish control of a part of my music empire. That there is a small consideration involved is not denied but I shall retain control of major tracts of the music industry whilst at the same time see my immense workload decrease so that I can spend more time with my money.

In celebration of this realignment of my life, but entirely coincidentally, we shall be flying to Naples this evening to board Sea Breezes for an eagerly awaited cruise along the Amalfi coast in Italy. I have never before slept on board a boat (unless you count a siesta on the way back from St Tropez once) so it will be an interesting experience. I am told that the boat has very efficient stabilisers and that the most movement I can expect is akin to being rocked to sleep. We shall spend 4 days aboard and, as Internet access may be patchy when one is at sea, it may be that this column, your vital daily part of your news gathering on the information superhighway may be delayed. Rest assured that there will still be a daily column but it may not always appear on the day in question. For those of you sighing with relief, tough.

Chris France
@Valbonne_News