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Not mushroom in the garden

March 21, 2012

Before I fully resume my duties for Currencies Direct I will need to move some furniture etc back to Valbonne and need a furniture removal company. I have seen an advert in some local magazines for a company called Tooth Removals. I mentioned this to that nice lady decorator and she wanted to know why I needed a dentist to transport furniture. Maybe they are based in Denton?  I look a bit down in the mouth because I won’t be back in Valbonne until next week.

I thought I had done all the dentist jokes until I heard from Slash And Burn Thornton Allan that he has a chinese dentist and he had an appointment there yesterday at tooth hurty, and I am not joking,

Last night to what used to be one of the best pubs in Buckinghamshire, The Chequers in Weston Turville which has all its character, removed by the new owners and is not even a shadow of its former self. It did however serve a very decent pint of Timothy Taylor Landlord which is the second best beer in the world behind Fullers London Pride. A discussion ensued about interesting names given to beers and I think my favourite was one I spotted when in Cornwall last year when I found a pint of Ginger Tosser. The beer was awful though, so bad I found the need to call up a couple of my red-headed friends and tell them about it, they were so pleased to hear from me.

Today I shall be spending another day with that nice lady decorator in hoarding mode and be trying to reduce the amount of stuff she wants to keep. Actually she has been very good but I need to keep a close eye on her. Let me give an example; Yesterday she was successful in persuading me she should keep the wooden toadstools I made for a joke 10 years ago pictured today. Do you see what I am getting at?

Its amazing! magic mushrooms have grown again!

She had bought some mushroom spores or mushroom compost as I had complained that mushrooms bought from supermarkets had no taste and I could not find field mushrooms anywhere. So I could not resist whittling a few “magic” mushrooms and planting them in the same spot about a week later (I know, I need to get a proper job, too much time on my hands then).

Of course, nowadays, with my position at Currencies Direct and as a sucessful author I have little time for leisure as regular readers will know and today is no exception. I think I can describe very detail of the local tip from memory, and with every charity shop in the neighbourhood now stuffed full of detritus extracted from our house in the UK I am looking for new outlets, and thankfully someone has volunteered to do a car boot sale for us. I do hope they have a pantechnicon in which to collect all the stuff.

Talking of writing, the people who bought my first book, “Summer In The Cote d’Azur”and the people still to buy it will be thrilled to learn that I have begun work on the second. This one will have pictures, so those that have suffered the indignity of having their photo feature in this column will have something else to celebrate when the book is published in the late autumn in time for people to purchase as exclusive Christmas gifts for friends or family, or indeed someone you don’t like. You have been warned. I have my camera with me wherever I go….

Chris France

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