Crocs from Dundee?

June 27, 2010

tags: Blue water Yachting, Cote D Azur, Currencies Direct, Ex Pats Golf, fr2day, Living In France

After my piece on crocs yesterday, I am sent a link my Mike Hardaker of Anglo Info to a website supplying golf crocs! I must say they look so awful I may be tempted!

His wife Wendy was clearly trying to remain unidentified when calling herself Ann on Friday, I assume that such is the imagined opprobrium with which one is treated if in the vicinity of crocs that she considers a pseudonym necessary.
At first there was no response from him to the suggestion I made about his and hers crocs yesterday, but later I receive a frankly incomprehensible missive about Argyll knee socks, and then goes on to relate that his lovely wife Wendy had to tie my shoelaces for me at The Riviera Business Club party on Friday.

Of course this particular act could be mistaken for something different from certain angles, but I will fight anyone who suggests that her kind offer of help and the service she administered was anything other than the tieing of an old mans shoelaces.

The almost universal distaste for Crocs has become apparent from the comments I receive. Mike Preston writes about “Rhodesian Flatdogs” as crocs were apparently known in his part of the world, he says he realised that his girlfriend hated him when she gave him a pair.

I wonder if there was a tartan croc, made in Scotland, would they be called Cocodile Dundee? Just cant see it going with the kilt that I wheel out at certain times of the year to give the girls a thrill fright.

Such was the success at my bar at the Mougins School Fair yesterday that nearly every beer was sold. This despite being next door to the champagne bar organised by the very beautiful Anne, where we had to insist on a ribbon barrier to stop the great unwashed, troughing in bubbles next door, from overflowing into my rather more genteel bar area. You can just see the chasm of class between the two areas in my picture below which shows some of my staff, Peter Bennett for Blue Water, Simon Howes and Paul Thornton Allan for Creative Village hard at work (supposedly) dispensing beer (mainly to themselves it should be noted) and wine to the thirsty revellers.

Drink no evil, eat no evil, smoke no evil

An astute viewer of this picture may notice the linen tablecloth on the left hand side, the “decoration” theme for their rather down market and frankly limited offering of champagne and canapes adjacent.

Also their use of plain glass flutes to serve their wares cannot be matched by the size and sheer quantity of polystyrene cups, our chosen mode of drink delivery. I did however notice another detail in this picture which leads me to suspect a bit of backsliding. Mr Howes, in the centre, appears if one looks at his hand gesture, to be ordering 2 glasses of champagne from my rivals. His protestations that he was merely tuning into Glastonbury in his head is frankly a very poor excuse.

In all seriousness sometimes, well often, lacking in this column, it was a great day out, the highlight for the kids being Brian Hickmore, the headmaster, consigned to the stocks and receiving a number of direct hits!

I am double booked this afternoon, I have accepted a barbecue invitation from the lovely Maria The Pecker, whilst the resident plasterer has accepted another barbecue invitation at the same time. So after some discussion at me, rather than with me, it was decided, but not with any input from me, that the in-house decorators invitation acceptance took precedence. I know Maria especially will be relieved at the absence of this particular reporter at this event, but Maria, be warned, my ears and eyes are everywhere!

Chris France

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