The Ashes, and global warming

I made just one new resolution this year, and that was to make no new years resolutions, so that’s already over then. As the 5th Ashes Test ended in the crushing victory for England over Australia as expected, I was a little late to bed due to having been lavishly entertained by the wingco. We were together when it happened, the victory, and like the death of John Kennedy and 9/11 I will for ever remember where I was when the urn was won.

This made my awakening too late to attend church at Cafe Latin yesterday morning, so I missed what Neil (I’m free) Humphreys was wearing, thus I am fashionably bereft this week. I had a look at his Facebook page however and saw some fascinating photos of a party over Christmas where the theme appeared to be “dress to kill”. Had I been invited, I think a beard, a turban and a backpack with wires sticking out might have been appropriate, which is probably why I was not invited. Maybe I could have gone as sandpaper, then I could have said that rather than being dressed to kill I only wanted to rough somebody up a bit.

My picture today is of some nice autumn dahlias I took in London a few months ago – just to brighten my day. It is a bad day when I have to feature a photo in England to counteract the weather over here.

Dahlias in Holland Park in autumn

I have been trying to enjoy this appalling weather, but I believe my Gene Kelly impersonation was not enjoyed by anyone, especially Banjo on my morning walk. Singing in the rain indeed, if I could get hold of god, or whoever is responsible for this weather, I would demand a refund, I did not pay all this money to live in paradise for it to rain for days on end, blimey, it’s almost as bad as England!

Global warming? It just isn’t happening. I have been saying this since the 1970’s, what we are seeing is a cyclical general increase in temperatures, probably due to sunspots or the activity of the sun which will reverse itself in under 100 years, so all this nonsense about carbon emissions is crap. Did you know that over 50% of the world’s carbon emissions are from the arses of animals? I think they might have been around for a few thousand years and probably in greater profusion until we started to kill them all off. What about all that fuss over the thinning ozone layer a few years ago? Not a word about it now because it has recovered to 1960’s levels, and then England gets its coldest December for hundreds of years and the climate lobby are surprised. There we go then, my bit of controversy for the day, look forward to hearing some comments from those sucked in by the vested interests that fuel the global warming PR machine.

Chris France
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