Justice done, but midges await

Justice was done, despite handicap systems designed to thwart a proper golfer, justice was mine and victory sealed. Sadly, the girls I was playing with, clearly with some sort of pre knowledge of the result, declined a wager. not apparently being prepared to risk 10 euros ( a mere £8.20 at today exchange rate). 

They are also being most cruel about some email issues I have been having, where the server system appears to have added recipients of confidential messages. They have invented a number of inappropriate emails that they have purported to have received from me (although I wish I had sent the one to Fifi Amour in Vallauris) doubtless others will follow in a similar vein, it cannot be long before I will be subjected to being accused of sending emails requesting Viagra, happy endings, hair loss replacement, travelling massage or how to write, or play golf or tennis properly. Be warned you idle miscreants, the curse of the blog will be upon you. 

Tonight, a select few will descend on the pav for, well, I don’t know really, but they will. I of course, will remain sober, as is my want and if you believe that then you probably believe in Fifi Amour. 

There is talk of tennis this morning but not until 11, by which time my days work will be complete. This will be followed, as night follows day, by lunch at Auberge St Donat, the boys venue of choice. 

I hear from Steve Weston, our resident sheep correspondent who wishes to know where Cambria is,  he thought it was in Wales, bit if that is the case it is probably wishful thinking given that the Welsh have a well-known love of sheep.  Cambria is of course how an Essex boy would describe the Lake District. 

My picture today shows what happens to a Yorkshireman, in this case Mick “German Shooting Trouser” Pedley has to change from his usual Yorkshire attire ( galoshes, sackcloth, waders, deerstalker – actually, I wonder if Steve Weston has a sheepstalker hat?) to be allowed to play golf in the south of France.  As you can see the salesman must have seen him coming, and sussed that he was colour blind from the start. 

Mick Pedley in green shirt and matching, yes matching, that is what the salesman told him, green checked shorts. Clearly from this pose they are a tad uncomfortable, but what is a bit of discomfort in the pursuit of fashion?

Sadly, I will not be at the Regs golf event this Sunday, as I will be travelling back from the frozen north of England, having no doubt enjoyed Lout without an H. The long-range forecast is better than I could have hoped, with only slight frosts expected overnight, and even some sunshine during the day, so I guess the witch doctors or whatever passes for a medical service in those parts will, as we speak, be preparing some concoctions to ward off sun burn that the locals will suffer in profusion if the temperature gets above to the forecast 14 degrees. One wonders what they might use? Pond slime perhaps?  My fear of being frozen to death has been replaced by the possibility of being bitten to death, as, if there is some sunshine, the softening tundra will probably produce a plague of midges to pester us all. 

Chris France       

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