Fine for porno moustache shock

Last evening was spent at The Bracken Fox on the Weatherby road at Scarcroft.  Just review that phrase. it’s utterly evocative of where I was marooned last night. Bracken to me implies damp vegetation in winter, Weatherby? well regular readers will know what I think about the English weather, Scarcroft, scars implies injury, and to add insult to injury no Timothy Taylor Landlord to drink.

My only solace is the phalanx of those solid Yorkshire folk around me.  Unsophisticated by most modern standards, they are good-hearted people, desperately, in the most part, trying to eek out a living in the grim wastelands, the lucky ones  earning a crust wherever they can, tilling the soil, growing tripe and black pudding in a misguided attempt to poison amuse the few plucky tourists who venture this far north. The elite are able to earn enough to exchange life in the frozen north for a few brief days in the sunshine of southern Europe, usually not for more than a week, but their excitement at the prospect is palpable.  After a brief and tantalizing visit to civilisation, its back to the grim northern life of tripe, black pudding and rhubarb.  Yes rhubarb, I have discovered that nearby is an area called the Rhubarb Triangle. This is about as interesting as it gets.

My picture today is of the 2 teams who battled in out on Wednesday and includes our mascot for the day, former England and Yorkshire cricket captain Ray Illingworth.

Lords Taverners North v Lords Taverners Newcastle NSW plus Ray Illingworth

After the truncated cricket yesterday, we were treated to an impromptu speech by Fraser Hines, from whom I felt compelled to purchase a book after my rather harsh comments earlier in the week, however this was spotted by Julian Dismore, fines secretary, who promptly fined Fraser the full £20 purchase price for soliciting sales in the dressing room.  He tells me that he must have taken 900 wickets in his cricketing career, that must be a least 30 a season, or 1 a game on average,  a stunning statistic! He is a very funny and approachable man, in no way affected by his long and successful acting career, or a hard life in Yorkshire.

A number of the fines imposed (which all go to the Lords Taverners charity) are in my opinion rather harsh. One is imposed upon Jeff Barnes of our team for being short, others for various vagaries or offences committed during the games, others figments of Mr Dismore’s imagination. I was particularly hurt myself by being fined £2 for having a”dodgy 70’s porno moustache”, twice,  as I played in 2 games! apprently the first fine on Wednesday should have been a warning.

Today, after being rained on whilst going to the airport, I shall return to civilisation in the inverse direction of those poor hapless northerners.  Last night for instance, a large fillet steak and chips were the very least that was required to sustain someone who had spent most of yesterday in cold rain in a field in Yorkshire. Today a light seafood salad will suffice as my body readjusts to life in a  civilised part of the world.

Golf with Dave the Fade and the Landlubbers is on the horizon tomorrow, as long as the storms threatened to not appear and where once again my subtle silver golf shoes will allow me to dance my way around 18 holes, but politely backing off towards the end to allow some less favoured entrant a chance at glory.  Glory being the word for having to pick up the bar bill which always exceeds the winnings!

Chris France      

buying a house in France, moving money? www.currenciesdirect.net/chrisfrance      

Latest local news? http://www.fr2day.com/      

Best Estate Agency in Valbonne? http://www.rivierarealty.net/      

Best French Riviera Property Agent?        

http://www.afa-international.com/      

http://frenchriviera-properties.com/      

rent my house in summer? http://www.holiday-rentals.co.uk/p412514      

Best on line resource in Valbonne? http://www.valbonneonline.com/      

Secret supper club http://www.red-radish.com/      

Wedding reception? http://www.bastidestmathieu.com/      

Valbonne Tourist Office http://www.tourisme-valbonne.com      

Top quality interior designer? http://www.marineguigue.com/      

John Otway’s New  Book? www.johnotway.com      

Modular portable exhibition system? http://www.creative-village.co.uk/web_ads/bigger_picture.html      

Living France, Le Blog   http://livinginfrance.mon-coach-langues.com      

Best  Estate Agent in Mandelieu? www.chrisma.com