More Golfing Expressions

May 10, 2010

tags: Brague, Currencies Direct, John Otway, Living In France, Moving To France

My dear friend Mark Gurdon sends me some new golf expressions, or at least some I have not heard. A Rock Hudson for instance is a putt that looked straight but isn’t and a “Ryanair”, which flies well but lands a long way from the target! Many of Dave the fades shots will in future be known as Jean Marie Le Pen, flying as they so often do, a long way to the right! Does that mean that Paul North’s attempts will in future be known as a Nick Griffin?

French driving is something that I have not covered here in the past, but it is something to behold. 10 years or more ago, driving in France was akin to a lottery, the secret was not to be on the same stretch of road as a Frenchman if you could possible help it, particularly in the early afternoon after lunch had taken its toll, but in the last few years I have discerned an improvement, except when they tailgate you, but the single most irritating thing is the little dinks you get wherever you park. I would suggest there is not a car on the road in France that hasn’t got a little dent somewhere, indeed it is a daily occurence, and one of the main reasons to trade down from a Bentley to a Mercedes. At the moment I am sporting 5 “dinks”. My old friend Jeff Potter reminds me of when I was younger how I would never walk anywhere and when I bought my first Rolls Royce I would only ever go to pubs where I could be seen getting out. This is of course scandalous libel, I only went to pubs where the car park was full and I could park badly and await the call, “anyone got a Rolls Royce?” It was John Otway who had the first Bentley amongst us, after his first flush of fame in 1978, but this was a bit of an extravagance as he could not and still cannot drive. He was so uncoordinated as to be dangerous, he once had a motorbike and fell off on the way from Aylesbury to Luton 9 times on the same trip! but my favourite motoring story is when the afore-mentioned Mr Potter had spent 6 months carefully restoring a pink lambretta scooter, Otway decided to show him how to do a wheely and promptly totalled it! Not sure that is in the new John Otway book!

A severe thunderstorm overnight deposits a good six inches ( I wonder if Maria’s ears pricked up?) on my garden and consequently The Brague is in full flow as my picture today fails to suggest.